The Cabbagelandetian Times

[CabbagePreacher]

Following Brassicus II's democratization and un-democratization events after he seized power, The Cabbagelandiet Times was created to inform his subjects of what in the bloody hell was going on. The newspaper publishes news every weekend but an early release of news might come if an important thing has happened.

[CabbagePreacher]

Elections return again!

As promised by Grand Preacher and Glorious Leader Brassicus II, new law allowing elections have been implemented. Citizens are encorouged to decide which party to vote on soon, as elections are to be done next week...

Reported and Written by Rapor Tajci

Spoiler: show

As promised by Grand Preacher and Glorious Leader Brassicus II, new law allowing elections have been implemented. Citizens are encorouged to decide which party to vote on soon, as elections are to be done next week, and the first parties have been formed, with encorougment from G.Prc. Brassicus II himself. Three parties have been formed by now, with more pending approval at the office. The parties will contend for seats at the Grandoise Council of Cabbagelandiet. Some have expressed concern, saying that the council doesn't have enough power, while some say that the Holy Authority of the Grand Preacher shouldn't be diminished and the council shouldn't have much power. Whatever happens we hope that Brassica Prime helps us get through these times. More about the parties and the election in our politics edition next week.

[CabbagePreacher]

All About Politics!

As the mess that's politics has been sorted out, this issue is all about politics, and who you should vote for.

Reported and Written by Polit Ikaciadam

Spoiler: show

While alot of parties of different beliefs have been formed, 2 main parties have come on top in the recent polls. Cabbagelandetia Brassican Party, or the CBA, known for their conservative outlook, the Liberty Front, which is a coalition of liberal parties. Smaller parties have been basically forgotten, and it seems these 2 parties will get atleast %85 of the votes. Citizens are expected to be casting their votes the next day, with voting starting in 8:00. We are going to be interviewing both of the parties leaders, and G.Pr. Brassicus II after the election ends. Goodbye, and Brassica Bless.

On other news...
- Several goers of in a Lodjan ship, currently in the Festival of Sail, were seen running out of the boat panicking. Officials have refused to comment why the panic happened.
- G.Pr. Brassicus II has gone to the Festival of Sail, reason unknown.

[CabbagePreacher]

The Elections End, with sad news.

Last night, the elections took place and the CBA won, but while the last votes were counted, our news station, and other news stations around the country recieved sad news: Grand Preachress Bergit, wife to Grand Preacher Brassicus II, had passed away.

Reported and Written by Rapor Tajci

Spoiler: show

While this edition was supposed to be the politics edition, news of G.Prs. Bergit's passing has deeply saddened all of us, and today and the days until the funeral being a national holiday, our newspaper won't be publishing today. Goodbye, and Brassica Bless.

On other news...
- Cabbagelandetian female singer, Sharkicik Adin's latest album has broken sales records in Cabbagelandiet.

[CabbagePreacher]

Cabbagelandiet finally on the map.

After hard work with diplomacy, Cabbagelandiet has been added to the maps of Mundus. Paper prices have increased due to printing presses buying paper to print new maps.

Reported and Written by Rapor Tajci

Spoiler: show

As the national holiday ended our news station got some good news: Cabbagelandiet is on the map! After hardwork and trying to find out where Cabbagelandetians actually live, our border has been set between Lyeia and Muneski, the whole coastline being ours. Paper prices have skyrocketed, as printing presses have been working overtime to distribute the new map. One concerned citizen of Precathe, Uzack Kishi said "I was dang afraid those foreign map-makin' hombres would exclude Precathe from the map. We only are dang dibbin' 10,000 people workin' in this province. We don't wanna be subject to those hombres trying to steal my homelands!".

On other news...
- Precathe has been getting some attention, with a railroad now being planned to connect Longchurch and Uxakyer passing through Precathe.
- G. Pr. Brassicus II has spoken out against slavery, supporting the action that has been done against Tamora.

[CabbagePreacher]

Brassicus II visits Lodja.

After some back-and-forth letters between Lodja and Cabbagelandiet, Brassicus II has visited Lodja.

Reported and Written by Rapor Tajci

Spoiler: show

After expressing interest in an alliance between Lodja and Cabbagelandiet, Brassicus II has visited Cabbagelandiet. In an interview, Brasicus II said "Well, we need friends in this tough world of diplomacy. Imagine what would happen if somebody attacked Cabbagelandiet now, our armies can't stand up to the modern world of technology." Some Lodjan pilgrims have recorded him getting salted before entering the "Isle of the Godess".

On other news...
- The price of salt around the nation has increased.
- Cabbagelandetian inflation has been rapidly increasing, economic experts are unsure why.
- The Cabbagelandetian has announced that they will be decomissioning muskets in the military in a short time, citing that modern manufacturing methods have made the BRA-21 more available than a musket.

[CabbagePreacher]

A Preacher and a Duchess

In Brassicus II's visit to the Spice Festival, he has been seen dancing with the former Grand Duchess Alys Arselnaut of Marseilles.

Reported and Written by Rapor Tajci

Spoiler: show

As the Spice Festival is drawing to a close, we wanted to know the truth to the rumors of "Is Brassicus II dating Alys?". The two were seen dancing together in the Festival. We interviewed Grand Preacher Brassicus II to find out the truth.

Good morning Your Holiness, how was the Spice Festival?
Oh for Brassicus Prime's sake didn't I tell you not to call me "Your Holiness", I have already told you, the only holy thing in this room is Brassicus Prime watching over us! Back on the topic the festival was... something unique. I was late to there, never got to taste the spice, but I did get to meet someone and I did get assaulted by a badger.

So who's the person you met?
Alys.

Alys... who?
Grand Duchess Alys Arselnaut of Marseilles.

Some have been saying that there was more than a meeting between you and Grand Duchess Alys Arselnaut of Marseilles.
Oh bloody hell, where do you people get your sources from? You would be wrong on the topic of there being more than what you see happening. We danced around, I escorted her to her car, and I got assaulted by a badger.

But any feelings?
Ahem, do you think it would be really appropriate to publish this stuff on a newspaper? You know, privacy and the like.

Is a future marriage with Grand Duchess Alys Arselnaut is possible?
Bloody hell you and your questions... Yes, yes it is.

As G.D. Alys A. is the former ruler of Marseilles, will you be helping her reclaim her throne?
That's a... hard question. If she tries to do it militarily, then no. If she tries to do it diplomatically, yes. I have read about what happened in Marseilles and I don't want to make the Marseillen people suffer in another war, even if they aren't my people. And a ruler who kills her own people is a ruler who has no right to rule.

Previously you mentioned a badger attack?
Ah yes, the honeybadger. I assume that it was left by the Morelanders who crashed into the room during the festivities. I found the honeybadger in my car and it caught me by surprise. I got help from a fellow in the hall who shot the badger. Though the badger had kind of made the room stink with it's foul smells and everyone had to be evacuated upstairs.

That's all Your Hol-- Brassicus II.
Alright, Brassicus Prime bless you, can you let me drink my tea in peace now?

On other news...
- Endstria has been found out to be the cleanest and sterile county to live in, followed up by Brasscirom, according to the latest "Cabbagelandetian Sterility and Cleanliness Survey".