Evanthe couldn't fight the tide of emotions and, her initial resistance worn away, allowed herself to be carried away by Joshua's embrace. It was only when Andrew interrupted them that she returned, as did the challenges of reality. With the touch of Andrew that reality became more present, her reply a nod and a sigh as she thought about the situation which she found herself in. "Thank you, I won't drag things out too long I promise," she said before joining Joshua in her quarters.
"It was quite the surprise for me to see the Gypsy Dancer again, you could consider her a 'gift' of Gregory McKenna, whom to this day refuses to reveal too much of his past to me. I do hope you approve of the work, I hear there was much that had to be done before she could even put to sea again. So much has changed in your absence, the times were turbulent and the future itself was never clear, but I knew once Seaforth went dark I couldn't stand aside and do nothing. I secured Somerset's future within a bubble of Rokkenjiman sovereignty and saved what I could of our country, losing myself in my duties to both Somerset and Rokkenjima."
She chuckled for a moment, "Yes, you missed the era a Rhodes ruled over Rokkenjima, many times I imagined how you would react to that, indeed, every day I thought what you would think, what you would do, many days I cried for hours at the apparent cruelty of fate. I lost myself in my work, it hurt less than the daily realization that I would never see you again, hold you again or hear your voice again but, that transmission," she trailed off, "It was strained and hard to decipher initially, but I knew it in my heart that it was you, and here we are."
"For the longest I was content to lose myself to work and duty, but through it all I was neglecting myself, Josiah, everything, just for the release it presented. After a while though I began to live again, it was hard, but I had some help along the way. I don't know how to say it, and I know you just returned, but it can't be left unsaid any longer. Joshua," she said, placing her hand upon his, "Please understand I thought I had lost you, I thought you had perished in the Fall and without anyone to tell me any different, I lost all hope. On the Establishment Day of Somerset Count Emerson proposed to me, we had been spending more time together and in many ways he saved me from the hopeless world which had become my reality, but now I am thrust into a world where I have no bearings, no solid ground to stand upon, and I feel as though I have betrayed you both."
She took to her feet and turned away from Joshua, "I can feel the anger swell within you, the pain, and I know that I am its cause, just moments ago we were on top of Mundus and I had to tear that away from you so quickly, so violently, I would understand if you could never set eyes upon me again." She found a moment to chuckle between her tears, "Even now in this moment I speak not as a Seaforthian but a Rokkenjiman, using too many words. It's just...the moment I lost hope for my...our life...the moment I felt that I had waited long enough to begin the task of rebuilding my life from the rubble, it turns out that I had lost faith too soon, I gave up on you too soon, perhaps I should have waited another two years?" she asked rhetorically.
"I'm sorry this is the welcome that I have for you, I should have known that you'd find a way back to me, yet I wavered and now the pain of two hearts is upon me. I will understand if you wish me to leave now never to return, however know this," she said turning to face him again. "I will talk to Emerson, I will explain everything that we've discussed, and why I feel I cannot pursue our engagement any longer, even should you cast me away. I made a vow to you, Joshua Rhodes, and even in a world where we could not be together, it is a vow I will uphold. We do not break our word, and I won't be the Rhodes who breaks hers."
